The First Time
by MoonKent
Summary: When the enchantress cursed me to become a beast, it was the first time I regretted my actions. But it wouldn't be the last. Movie prologue.


Pain. That was the first thing that I felt when the enchantress cursed me. Pain as my body was contorted, as my bones ground themselves to new shapes, as my skin stretched to fit the growing musculature, as fur pushed through and sprouted. My cry of horror shifted from a human scream to an animalistic howl.

Then blackness. When I awoke, I at first thought I had had a horrible nightmare. I tried to push myself upright and stumbled. My legs didn't work right. My head was too heavy. My vision was blurred. Why was it so dark? I opened my mouth to call for the servants. A snarl reached my ears instead of my voice. Fear began to fill me.

I blinked to clear my vision and things gradually began to focus. "Master!" I heard the comforting voice of Mrs. Potts. I turned my too-heavy head to look for her, but there was no one. "Master, what happened?" she asked again. When I finally saw her familiar eyes, I jerked back in horror. They looked out at me from a teapot. And she wasn't alone. A clock, a candelabra, and several other objects with eyes and faces were crowded nearby, looking as confused as I felt.

I pushed away and caught sight of my hand. Or what used to be my hand. I couldn't believe that it was mine except that it moved when I moved it. All the fingers were there, but were covered with a short, brown fur, with sharp claws extending from each tip. My hand felt thick and meaty. The attached arm was just as large and furry, and when I looked down, I realized that my entire body had a new form. It was…beastly.

Suddenly, remembrance hit me. "The enchantress!" I gasped. My voice was too deep, too growly, and the words were garbled. I felt like my mouth had too many teeth and I didn't know where to put my tongue to make the words form right. I tried again. "The enchantress, where is she?" This time they came out clear enough.

The servants looked at each other. "What enchantress, Master? What happened?" Mrs. Potts asked again.

I grabbed a nearby chair, and struggled to my feet, this time successfully, though I left several tears in the fabric. I stumbled to the door. "She was here, she was just here! Disguised as a beggar woman!" Maybe she was still here. Maybe she would listen to my pleas to change me back. I would apologize and be sincere this time.

I finally managed to shove the door open. There was no sign of the enchantress. There was nothing but the blinding snow and cold. I sagged against the doorway.

But wait…a splash of color caught my eye. I pushed into the frigid wind to look closer. It was…a rose. Somehow, inexplicably, it hovered in full bloom above the surface of the stone walkway, a luminescent glow protecting it from the elements. The enchantress' last words slowly came back to me as I stared at it.

"_I leave you this rose as a symbol of your release. It will bloom until your twenty-first year. You have until then to break the spell." My face must have shown the question that I was afraid to ask. "You must find love: if you can learn to love another, and earn her love in return, before the rose wilts completely and the last petal falls, you will be restored to your human form." Her eyes pierced me. "If not, you shall be doomed to remain a beast until the end of your days."_

I shuddered. I couldn't stay like this forever. Even these few minutes had been already unbearable. But hadn't she said something else? I tried to recall.

"_I will also leave you one gift: the ability to see the world that you are no longer a part of. Look upon this mirror and ask it to show what you will. You may consider it a blessing or a curse."_

I glanced beneath the rose, and there on stones lay an elaborate hand mirror partially buried by the snow. I pulled it out and demanded, "Show me the enchantress!" There was no time to absorb my new reflection before her face appeared.

"Greetings, young prince," she said.

I was in no mood for politeness. "You must undo this curse!"

"Must I? Do you not remember that it was this very temperament that caused your curse?"

Desperation made me drop my anger. "Please! I can't live like this!"

She shook her head. "My apologies, young prince, but I cannot. Your fate rests in your own hands now. You will not be able to contact me this way again."

"No, please!"

"If I were you, young prince, I would not allow the rose to remain outdoors in this weather. You have only until the last petal falls to undo your curse. Should it come to harm now, you may find yourself a permanent beast sooner than you thought."

I whipped my head up to look at it, and when I looked back, she was gone. "Show me the enchantress!" I cried. Nothing happened. I shook the mirror, but it remained stubbornly blank.

I suddenly shivered, and realized how long I had been standing here. Despite my new fur coat, I was not impervious to the cold. Carefully grasping the rose by the tip of the stem, I brought it into the safety of the castle. "Quick!" I shouted to whoever was nearby. "Bring me something to put this under! Under, not in!"

"What is it, Master?" Mrs. Potts dared to ask.

"It's a symbol of the curse," I said, not taking my eyes off of it. "I have only until the last petal falls to become human again."

"And us as well?" a candlestick wished to know. I think he might have been Lumiere.

I barely threw them a glance. "Yes, I suppose."

"What will undo the curse?"

I grimaced. "I have to love a girl and earn her love in return." I didn't want to talk about this. "Why has no one brought something to cover this rose?"

"Not all of us have hands and feet anymore," I thought I heard someone mutter. I glared, but couldn't tell who had spoken.

"Forget it, I'll find something myself!" I snarled. I stalked away as best I could up the stairs to my rooms, though I still took care not to damage either the rose or the mirror. Once there, I found a bell-shaped glass dome which fit perfectly over the small bloom. Now nothing could touch it. I placed the mirror next to it on the small table.

A dripping sound made me realize that the snow which had stuck to my fur was now melting. My clothes were already soaking through. Looking at them, I realized that they were ragged and torn from my recent change in size, though they still managed to cover me decently enough. I ripped them off completely, throwing them aside, and moved to the wardrobe.

A passing reflection in a full-length mirror made me freeze. Slowly I turned and viewed myself full-on. Until now, I hadn't realized the full extent of the curse. I'd known that I'd grown rather large and sprouted fur, but my face! There was virtually nothing human about it anymore. There were sharp fangs that protruded even when my mouth was closed. Two curled horns rose above a thick mane of fur. Thick, heavy brows nearly hid my eyes. My eyes…they were the only thing that I recognized. They were still the same blue. I looked away. It almost made the whole thing worse. I managed to look at the rest of my new body. Huge shoulders hunched over a massive body, balanced on two wolf-like legs. No wonder I had trouble walking. A flick of movement behind me made me gasp. A tail? How had I not noticed that?

This couldn't be me. It couldn't. I couldn't have deserved this. With a sudden howl, I flung the mirror to the opposite wall where it shattered into a hundred pieces. I barely cared about the new strength this move had required. All I wanted was to find a release for the boiling rage inside of me. I grabbed the wardrobe and upended it with a single shove. I tore my claws across a chair seat and then shoved it aside. I shredded long rips in the curtains. Anything and everything in sight was fair game. Except for a single, small table with a rose and a mirror.

Several hours later, I heard a faint knock on the door. "Go away!"

"Master, we've brought you some dinner," a timid voice called.

"I said, GO AWAY!" I snarled, throwing a chair leg at the door. "I do not wish to be seen!"

It was the first of many times that I hid from prying eyes.

* * *

It was well over a year the first time I ventured outside the castle walls. At first, I had been horrified at the thought of someone seeing me. But then as the months passed and not a single human had even come close to the castle, I had a worse thought: What if someone doesn't see me? What if I never have the chance to break the curse? I vaguely wondered if a part of the spell kept people from visiting. What did the outside world think had happened to me? Had the castle simply vanished overnight?

At last, I dared to enter the forest beyond the gate. I had made a plan. The magic mirror (the only one in the West Wing that was still in one piece) had shown me where the nearest estate lay. Some small family of vague nobility lived there. They had a daughter who seemed pretty enough. I would have her to break the curse, and then I could send her back with a small monetary reward. How hard could it be? The servants had advised against it, but I would not be told what to do.

I took the carriage (such as it was: a spidery contraption that needed no horses) and set out. The interior of it was almost too confining for my beast-form, but I would deal with it. Soon I would be free of this curse and it wouldn't matter. The estate was a full two-day's journey away, traveling day and night to get there.

Unfortunately, the trip ended in near disaster. Realizing only upon arrival that I couldn't simply stroll up through the main gate and order the girl to come with me, I resorted to stalking the edge of the grounds, hoping to catch her alone. Maybe I even had the vague idea of just snatching her up and carrying her back to the castle. However, before I ever caught a glimpse of her, I was spotted by one of the groundskeepers, who raced back to the estate screaming an alert about the vicious creature attacking. I snarled in frustration, which didn't help my case, as several men with guns headed directly towards me. I turned and fled back to the safety of the forest.

Only once I was back in the safety of the carriage and the sounds of the hunters had long since faded did I begin to relax. Their reactions had startled me. I'd long known that I was hideous, and I couldn't bear to look in a mirror, but until now, I somehow hadn't realized that I could be mistaken for a pure animal.

The carriage which had seemed like a safe haven suddenly seemed much too tight. "Stop! Let me out!" I shouted. It halted obediently, and I stumbled over to a nearby tree, leaning against it heavily. How was I supposed to do this? How could I break a curse that required human contact when they saw me as anything but?

I snarled and scratched at the tree, leaving deep marks. I wanted to be back at home. However, I did not feel like riding in the carriage. I ordered it to lead the way as I walked behind. It had taken some weeks to get used to this new body, but now I could walk on two legs without any trouble if I so chose. I let my mind wander. What should I do next? I wouldn't be able to come back to this estate, that was certain. Where else could I find a girl? I vaguely remembered that there was some small village within a day's reach of the castle, but those were peasants. I grimaced. Was that what it would take? True, a peasant would probably be easier to entice with a reward, but still, I would consider that a last resort.

A far-off howl jolted me from my thoughts. Looking around, I realized how dark it had gotten. Perhaps I should ride in the carriage again.

I moved toward it and a sudden snarling brought me up short. Just ahead, off the side of the path, a lone wolf hovered over a fresh kill. The sharp tang of blood hit my nose, and, inexplicably, my mouth began to water. The wolf snarled again, and a part of me said that I should be afraid, that this was a _wolf_, but something stronger inside suddenly seemed to take over. My fur bristled and stood on end, and I growled fiercely. The wolf dropped back slightly, and I knew that it was about to surrender. I pressed my advantage with a tremendous roar, and the wolf turned and slunk away.

I drew near to its kill. The overwhelming instincts began to dissipate, and I felt more like myself again, but I still had the strong urge to bend down and tear a chunk of meat to eat. Suddenly horrified, I fled to the carriage and huddled inside, ordering it to head home as quick as possible.

My reaction disturbed me. It was the first time I wondered: how much of me _was_ truly animal? And was it possible that the part of me that was still human could eventually disappear?

* * *

After that incident, I found myself desperately craving human contact. The servants were too much reminders of my curse to fill that need. More and more I turned to the mirror, asking to see anyone and everyone that I could think of. But that only made me feel more like an outsider. I could observe, but not interact. Unlike with the enchantress, no one else could see or hear me through the mirror. A part of me was thankful, for it left me free to watch as I pleased without fear of reprisal. But the greater part of me hated being so separated from all that I used to take for granted. I felt more alone than ever.

At length, I considered going down to the nearby village. Even just to experience with my own eyes and ears the lives of regular people again. I would have to remain undetected, of course. But the more I thought about it, the more determined I became to try. Anything was better than this desolate monotony. I planned as best I could, using the mirror to view the village from all sides to decide the best way to approach, the best place to see and not be seen. I did not want a repeat of the last time.

At last, I picked a night to go. The clouds had been heavy all day, and would obscure any light from the moon in the sky. My only worry was that it might rain, but at least that would justify the heavy cloak and hood that I had chosen to wear to hide my features.

I set out at dusk with the carriage again. It was too far of a walk to get there before the village was asleep; unless I wanted to leave in the daylight hours, which I considered too much of a risk. True, there had been no sign of a human anywhere near the castle since the curse had fallen, but I didn't want to take any chances. I found myself growing more nervous the closer we came. Would this be worth it? I didn't deceive myself into thinking that I would somehow meet a girl and instantly be able to break the spell, but at the very least I hoped…I didn't really know what I hoped for anymore.

When the carriage at last halted on the outskirts of the forest, I took a deep breath and crept out. At the very edge of the trees, I halted. Everything looked…calm and peaceful. By now, most villagers were inside their homes, so hopefully I wouldn't run into anyone unexpectedly on the streets. My plan for now was simply to peer through the windows and just _see_ the people.

The closest house lay slightly separate from the rest of the town. I went there first, but the house was dark and cold. No one lived there. I had to splash across a creek to get to next one. I grimaced. I hated wet fur. It left a disagreeable smell and took forever to dry.

I slipped up to the house, keeping to the shadows. Inside the main room, a warm light from a fire burned. I peeked in through the window, making sure that my hood fully covered my head. Sitting cozily around the fireplace was a young family. The father whittled away on a small carving. The mother worked her fingers on some type of weaving, using needles and string. The children played on the floor with dolls and blocks. But as I watched them, the thing that affected me the most was the way that they smiled and laughed and talked with each other. They looked so…happy. So peaceful and content. My heart twisted. I hadn't known such a thing was possible between people. How could mere peasants have something that I lacked?

I rested my head against the wall and groaned. Was this what I had to find to break the spell? I didn't even know where to begin anymore.

A sudden barking startled me. At a neighboring house, a young boy stood with a large hunting dog at the door. "What it is, boy? What do you smell?" the child asked. I cringed and pulled back into the shadows even more. From inside the house, a muffled voice shouted at the boy. He called back in annoyance, "I'm checking, I'm checking!" Stomping out of the house, I could hear him muttering, "_Gaston, do this, Gaston, do that…_"

I didn't have time to ponder how different the two families in these houses were, as the dog suddenly pulled free of the boy and ran towards me, barking again. I growled at it low in my throat as a warning, and it halted, but did not cease its noise.

"What is that?" The boy peered through the darkness, and I realized how close he was. I needed to get out of here, now. But the only way out was past the dog. At last, my fear of discovery eclipsed my fear of a fight and I rushed at the dog with a snarl. With a yelp, it sprang back, startling the boy. My hood became partially dislodged, and I knew by the gasp that the boy had seen something of me. However, I didn't expect him to yell, "Get it, Blue, get the beast! Chase that monster away!"

The dog moved to pounce, and I turned and fled on all fours, back to the safety of the woods, the words ringing through my head.

Monster. Beast.

The feelings built up inside of me until I couldn't hold them in any longer. I jerked to a halt and let out a fierce roar that echoed through the darkness around me. It was cathartic, but not enough. I pounded on the dirt beneath my feet. I tore branches off a nearby tree and snapped them all in two. I left deep gouges on the bark. I turned and ran again.

I had to get out of my own head. I couldn't stand it there.

Something bounded in front of me, and without even thinking, I attacked it. There was a short yelp, a snap of bones, and a coppery taste inside my mouth. Something deep inside me pushed to the forefront of my mind, something raw and instinctual. Something bestial. I could just relax and let it take control…

I suddenly came to my senses and realized what I had done. I looked at the small creature in front of me in horror. I think it was a fox. And I had just killed it. So easily. Without conscious decision.

That was the first time I realized how much easier it could be to just lose myself inside of the beast.

I didn't visit the village again.

* * *

I didn't remember the first time I started wearing less clothes. Since becoming a beast, I'd never fully dressed the way that I used to as a prince, and shoes were a downright impossibility, but I'd still kept my whole body covered.

I think it started when I took to prowling on the grounds. I'd roam endlessly, trying to push myself to exhaustion, so that when I finally went indoors, I could collapse on my bed and sleep dreamlessly. Sometimes I didn't change clothes for days on end, until the servants pestered me about it. At some point I realized that it would be easier to forego the superfluous attire, and just wear the bare minimum. It was nice not to have all that fabric pulling on my fur anymore.

I kept the dark hood and cloak that I'd worn to the village, though. Even though I no longer intended to visit human habitations, it was nice to know that I had some kind of barrier between me and anyone who might stumble across me while I was out roaming.

Sometimes, when I was out, I would surrender myself to the beast's instincts and let it go where it willed. Now and again, when it was hungry, it would attack and kill something, but I didn't care anymore. My only worry was whether the beast would try to harm a human, if one was unlucky enough to cross its path. To avoid that, I let it loose only in the darkest parts of the forest where no human dared set foot.

I didn't remember when I began to walk on all fours more than I walked on two legs. I didn't remember when I began to speak with growls and roars more than words. I didn't remember the first time I licked a wound clean, the first time I slept outside, the first time I marked my territory.

I didn't remember anymore.

* * *

The first time that a human stumbled upon the castle, I had been going out to hunt. It had become a ritual escape for me, at least every month or so. It was hard to keep track of time now, except for what the wilting rose reminded me.

I was moving down the stairs, already pulling back and letting the beast take over, when suddenly I smelled it. Prey. Living and close. Inside the castle. _Inside?_ I struggled to pull my own thoughts forward, but the instincts of the beast were already raging strong. It was hard to think.

I looked over the banister and I saw it. It was short, nearly hairless, and two-legged. _Two-legged?_

_It's human!_ I realized. Had it had been so long since I'd seen one? When did I start thinking of myself as non-human? I couldn't eat a human! The thought sickened me. But somehow that didn't stop my mouth from watering and my muscles tensing to pounce. I fought to control myself and my anger rose. Why did this person have to come now? At the worst possible time?

There was only one thing for it. I had to get him out of here before the temptation became too strong and I did something that I would forever regret. My temper rose even higher. I couldn't control both my anger and the beast. I flung the sitting-room door open wide with a snarl. The man wasn't immediately visible, but his living scent was everywhere. "There's a stranger here!" I growled at the servants. Didn't they know what would happen if I lost control?

"Ah, Master, allow me to explain," Lumiere said nervously. "The gentleman was lost in the woods. He was cold and wet, so…" I cut him off with a roar. That was their excuse?

Cogsworth attempted to stutter his own defense, but I would not hear any more. They were all at fault! I rounded the chair and found the man. So close, so vulnerable….

"Who are you? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" I demanded, forcing my mind away from the unthinkable.

The man cowered. "I-I was lost in the woods and-and…"

"You're not welcome here!"

"I-I'm sorry…" His voice trailed away as he took in my appearance, and I was acutely reminded of what he saw.

"What are you staring at?" I raised myself to my full height. He should be afraid. Afraid for his very life.

"Nothing!" he squeaked.

"So, you've come to stare at the BEAST, HAVE YOU?"

He bolted, but I cut him off like the easy prey he was. "Please," he begged. "I meant no harm! I just needed a place to stay!"

"I'll give you a place to stay!" I fired back. A place where he would be as far from me as possible, where it would be difficult to get at him, where he would have some measure of protection from me. The tower dungeon. I dragged him there and shoved him into the cell with the strongest bars and then raced away as quick as I could. I bolted straight for the dark forest, and finally let the beast have full control.

* * *

Sometime later, when I was once more back in my rooms, I found myself staring at the nearly wilted rose. It had been many years since the spell was cast. A part of me wondered whether I should just crush it now. I had long since given up hope that I would ever break the curse. There was too little time left now. Even if someone did come…

That reminded me of the man in the tower. How long had he been here? A day? Two days? I couldn't tell. Now that my hunting urge had been satiated, he was no longer a danger to me. I ought to release him. A terrifying roar and a threatening warning should be enough to dissuade him from ever returning. I left my rooms and slowly made my way up to the tower.

Halfway up tower staircase, I heard a voice I'd never heard before. Another intruder? Would there be no end of them? I just wanted to be left alone and forget the world as it had forgotten me. Seeing these people was just another form of torture, a reminder of what I could never have again. I hated the way that they flaunted their humanity so casually.

A small figure in a blue cloak knelt in front of the man's cell. Neither of them heard me approach, and when I snatched the figure away, anger made my voice harsh as I demanded to know why they were here.

Only when the hood fell away did I realize that it was a girl. "Who's there? Who are you?" she asked, her voice trembling, eyes darting back and forth to find me.

Instinctively, I held close to the shadows. "The Master of this castle." I shifted to a different angle for a better view of her. It had been so long since I'd really seen another human. The old man hardly counted considering the state of mind that I'd been in. She was young, and actually rather beautiful, with dark hair and wide, vivid eyes. It made me even more aware of my own hideousness. I realized she was talking again.

"I've come for my father. Please, let him out. Can't you see he's sick?"

I hadn't been here, of course I hadn't noticed. And I didn't really care. I'd been about to let him out anyway, until she came along telling me what to do. "Then he shouldn't have trespassed here!"

"But he could die! Please, I'll do anything!"

I was suddenly reminded of my own pleading with the enchantress, so long ago. She hadn't budged, and I wouldn't either. "There's nothing you can do. He's my prisoner." I couldn't bear to be up here anymore. I turned to leave. I would throw them out later.

"Wait!" she called, and although I growled at the command, I turned back once more.

Her voice was clear and strong. "Take me instead."

"You?" I couldn't have heard right. "You would…take his place?"

That was the first time that I felt hope.

* * *

_A/N: I wrote this to answer the question of why the Beast locked Maurice away, considering that the last time he mistreated a strange traveler, he ended up cursed. I went this route because there are actual bones that can be seen in the movie when the Beast returns to the West Wing after Belle refuses dinner. Then I expanded the story to a full prologue to explain the slow slide of the Beast's disappearing humanity. I hope you enjoyed it!_


End file.
